I want to write something uplifting.
I want to write something creative.
I want to write something humorous.
Yet I feel none of these things.
I'm still dealing with a lot of emotions carried over from the previous week. I'm not upset. I'm not depressed. I'm just devoid of emotion in either direction.
I feel unmotivated, yet at the same time deeply introspective. I'm a quiet person in general, but I'm finding myself slipping into silence and escaping into the solitude of my thoughts more often lately. Thoughts about Greg. Thoughts about his family. Thoughts about my future. Sometimes just random thoughts about ridiculous things. I talk to God a lot in these times...wrestling, questioning, praising. Simply expressing my feelings to Him in any way possible.
I know I'm healing. I know life continues and I must move forward. Yet I hate the thought of losing these feelings of pain and grief because I wonder if that means I am forgetting the loss?
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