I used to tell myself that. In fact, I used to believe that. Back when I was young and energetic...you know, when I was still in college. I used to be able to function on 4 hours of sleep. Now I find myself craving 7, 8, or 9 hours. Where did my youth go? Has it vanished? And what will happen when I reach that dreaded, quarter-of-a-century age that is 25?? My legs don't bend as easily as they did when I was 21...my knee pops when I run...my vision has steadily declined in the last several years...and worst of all...I don't go out at night. I find myself choosing to stay in on the weekends instead of venturing out into the wonderful world of clubbing, drinking, and socializing. Going to the movies and out to dinner...that's fine. But can I have the early-bird special, please?
Anyway, along with my physical weariness comes something much more serious. I find that I am spiritually weary as well. I spend less time in God's Word then I used to. And I don't have any good reasons as to why that is. I am working at building better habits and using my vast quiet time to commune with God, but often I feel distant from Him. And I wonder if I will ever be close again. I know it is in these times I need to cling to Him tighter then ever before, but I feel like my grasp is slipping...as if I have no strength to hold on. I know that I love Him completely, but I don't treat God like I should. I mean, He is the one who loves me more then ANYONE ever will! How incredible is that??!! I should love Him more than anyone too. But I often place other things and people ahead of Him. I take my best friend for granted because I do the things I want to do (even when I know I shouldn't) over following Christ. How selfish I am! How can he keep loving me? Amazingly and thankfully, He does. It's marvelous to have such incredible love in my life. So, I know this spiritual weariness is only passing. An opportunity for me to draw closer to God. To just rest in his presence. Because rest is what I need. Rest will allow me to be filled with strength again. Physically, our bodies need rest. We sleep at night so they will recover for the obstacles the next day presents. So it makes sense that our spiritual selves need rest too. We thrive on rest. And it is when we are resting that I believe we hear God clearer then ever because the noise of our lives is not surrounding us and filling us up. Only God is filling us up. And He fills us with the things we need most. He breathes life back into us. So I will relish the rest that God is asking me to take. :)
And I will embrace sleep. It's definitely not overrated. :)
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